Categories
Found

Consider This Post To Be A Bucket Of Truth

Quick quiz:

What do they have in common?

What do Marcus Fenix, Bender, and Steve Ballmer from TNT’s 1999 TV Movie *Pirates of Silicon Valley* all have in common?
You may think to answer “*They are all fictional characters!*” – but you would be wrong. Steve Ballmer actually exists, despite popular belief that he is just a cartoon character.

Your answer might be “*They all have six letter names!*” – but you would not only be wrong, but also unable to count.

You may be so clever as to answer “*You put them all in the same image!*” This is very true. But this is only for illustrative purposes, and should not be taken as something they have in common. Still, two points for effort.

Have you given up?

THEY ARE THE SAME MAN. All three were voiced and/or portrayed by John Di Maggio.

(Of course, if you read Giant Bomb, you already knew this.)

This has blown my mind as much as when I learned that the bushes in Super Mario Brothers were just re-colored clouds.

Categories
Endured

Strictly Business

Les Freres Corbusier present their latest show, the world premiere of Dance Dance Revolution, created by the company, directed by Alex Timbers, and featuring original songs by Gary Adler and Phoebe Kreutz.

Les Freres transforms the Ohio Theater into a fully immersive, bombed-out discotheque as it fuses unmerciful Japanese rave music with deeply regrettable sophomoric comedy in the futuristic dance spectacular, Dance Dance Revolution.

Riffing on fizzy dance musicals like Flashdance and death sport movies such as Rollerball, the show is set in an Orwellian society where dance is illegal. A group of local street toughs harbor no hope of overthrowing the fascistic no — fun government — until a mysterious dance prophet named Moonbeam Funk arrives.

Inspired by the wildly popular video game of the same name, Dance Dance Revolution is like Footloose set in the future — but much scarier, and with 40 really attractive, barely-clothed young actors as well as free beer!

Categories
Debated Disliked

A Moment Of Disturbing Honesty From Activision

Stephen Totilo of MTV reporting on a moment of honesty from today’s Activision/Blizzard earnings call, emphasis mine:

During today’s Activision Blizzard earnings call, a financial analyst asked the company’s CEO, Bobby Kotick, why the company didn’t keep all of Vivendi’s games when the two gaming companies merged.

The analyst didn’t name any games, but technically, he had to be referring to the likes of “Ghostbusters,” “50 Cent: Blood On The Sand” and the new “Riddick,” which all appear to have found new publishing homes…

Kotick responded not by addressing any of the games by name, but by talking about Activision’s publishing philosophy. The games Activision Blizzard didn’t pick up, he said, “don’t have the potential to be exploited every year on every platform with clear sequel potential and have the potential to become $100 million dollar franchises. … I think, generally, our strategy has been to focus… on the products that have those attributes and characteristics, the products that we know [that] if we release them today, we’ll be working on them 10 years from now…You still need to have production of new original property but you have to do it very selectively… the focus at retail and for the consumer is to continue to be on the big narrow and deep high profile release strategy… We’ve had enough experience that I think the strategy we employ is the most successful.”

I suppose I can appreciate the honesty, but as a gamer, I couldn’t be more nauseated.

That’s not to say I’m particularly surprised – what was the last significant franchise they created?

Tony Hawk? 1999.

Call Of Duty? 2003.

Guitar Hero? 2005.

I often love the games that are too quirky, too weird, too inaccessible, or too obscure for the mass market. And it’s sad that a company that was there when I started gaming 25 years ago has become so unwilling to take risks with their titles.