Disliked Puzzled Over

Are You McLovin?

Today, I was talking to [Matty]( about [Superbad]( So sure, the original trailer is great, but the “red band trailer” (distinguished by the red MPAA screen) is fantastic, possibly even the stuff of legend.

But [the YouTube link]( I had posted before has been pulled. Now, seemingly, the only way to get at it was through the official site’s [age verification section](

An abridged list of things we’ve learned on the Internet in the last ten years:

* CAPTCHAs don’t work.
* Cats are simultaneously hilarious and adorable.
* Anti-spam methods don’t work.
* Talking like an idiot never goes out of style.
* Age verification methods don’t work.

I’d like to focus on the last one, obviously.

The form to verify your age looks something like this:

The fine print on the same page reads:

>I understand that I am allowed to enter the Restricted Area only if I am 18 years or older and have a valid driver’s license. To verify my age, I hereby authorize Verification Financial Assurance Corporation (“VeriFAC”) to confirm the accuracy of the information I have provided against government-issued records. I acknowledge that the information I am providing on this page will not be collected by Sony and that it will only be accessed and used by VeriFAC to verify my age and for no other purposes.

So you have to have a driver’s license and be 18 or older. It would be easy to question the wisdom of forcing people to have a license to operate a motor vehicle to view an awesome movie trailer, but let’s not argue with that decision. It’s not like kids could just use their parents details – no kid under 18 knows their parents first *and* last names, let alone their birth day and their zip code. That’s some strong four-factor authentication.

Anyhow, the truly amusing part for me is that so much of the original trailer revolves around one character (Fogell, played by the incredibly named Christopher Mintz-Plasse) getting a fake ID with the name “McLovin” on it.

In what may be the greatest wasted opportunity in movie web site hisotry, the form does not successfully validate if you use a last name of “McLovin”, with a birth date of 06/03/1981 and a zip code of 96820. You get an error complaining that you didn’t fill out the first name field. Jesus, people, don’t you get it? He doesn’t even *have* a first name. HE **IS** McLOVIN.

I guess all you kids under 18 are out of luck if you want to watch [the red band trailer](, and you’ll have to wait till you’re older to see the DVD of what may be the greatest summer movie of all time. Sucks to be you, kids.

Sucks to be you.

Debated Disliked

Pry My iPod From My Cold, Run-Over Hands

NYC blog-types are up in arms today over [Carl Kruger’s proposed “no-ipod-or-cellphone-while-walking” ban](

> “While people are tuning into their iPods and cell phones, they’re tuning out the world around them… If you want to listen to your iPod, sit down and listen to it. You want to walk in the park, enjoy it. You want to jog around a jogging path, all the more power to you, but you should not be crossing streets and endangering yourself and the lives of others.”

It’s good to know that after a landmark election, particular in NY state, we are still giving government jobs to the batshit insane.

Before we get to the snark, here’s the simple, logical response I’ve been pitching in response all morning:

* If you’re crossing a street – with or without an iPod – in such a way that you are a danger to traffic and those around you, then you must not have the right of way.
* Logically, this means you are crossing against the light.
* This, of course, means that you are jaywalking, which is literally defined as “to cross or walk in the street or road unlawfully or without regard for approaching traffic.”
* We already have laws against jaywalking that are barely enforced.
* Why do we need another law?

Okay, on to the snark. Other distractions to ban around NYC:

* **Tourists that stop dead on the sidewalk of Times Square.** I’m constantly running into people taking pictures or gawking at neon signs. This is dangerous.
* **Stairs.** They are often slippery and/or wet, causing injury and possible death.
* **Rain.** Rain is distracting. Also, wet. Again, safety hazard!!!
* **Children.** Not only are they a distraction, they are a waste of taxpayer resources.
* **Cars.** Did you know the #1 cause of accidents on NYC’s roads are automobiles? It’s true! They must be banned immediately.
* **Light.** Our tourist friends have proven that any sort of shining object can lead to a disaster. Total darkness is much safer.
* **Evening.** On second though, plenty of bad things happen in the dark. Why, 74% of NYC crime occurs between the hours of 6PM and 6AM! Let’s get rid of 12 hours in the day.
* **Sound.** What’s more frightening than a car backfiring, a glass breaking, or a loud siren? Abolish noise, and we can focus on the task at hand – putting one foot in front of the other, repeatedly.
* **Knowledge.** You know the saying about curiosity killing the cat? ONE DEAD CAT IS TOO MANY PEOPLE.

I look forward to our non-existence going forward.

Disliked Found


In the 20-something years I’ve been using computers, I’ve heard a lot of stupid things said, but [this may in fact be the stupidest](, from the mouth of Bill Gates himself.

> Nowadays, security guys break the Mac every single day. Every single day, they come out with a total exploit, your machine can be taken over totally. I dare anybody to do that once a month on the Windows machine.

And people call Sony arrogant. Jesus christ.