Puzzled Over

I’ve Made A Terrible Mistake

As I’m walking into work this morning, I round the corner at 68th and 3rd Ave, and I see someone on a Segway barrelling down the sidewalk. This isn’t entirely strange, given that it’s the Upper East Side, but what is weird is that *he’s got two large handicapped stickers on it*.

Needless to say, I can’t wrap my head around this:

– If he’s physically handicapped, how does he get into the Segway?
– If he’s phsyically handicapped, how does he maintain his balance enough to use the Segway?
– If it’s not a physical handicap, would that imply he has a mental handicap?
– If it’s a mental handicap, what’s he doing riding it through pedestrian traffic on the sidewalk?
– Hell, even if it’s a physical handicap, what’s he doing riding it on the sidewalk?
– What benefit does one gain from having a handicapped sticker on a Segway? I wasn’t aware there were Segway parking spots, let alone *handicapped* Segway parking spots.