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Peter warned me this morning that the Friday Five is hitting a rough patch, as he skipped last week and this week. While I agree last week was ridiculous (When was the last time you cheated/lied/stole? This is a blog, not a confessional), this week I can work with. I think. FIVE HO!
1. If your life were a movie, what would the title be?
Ripping off an Asletics song title – The Sweetest Savage. Has a nice ring to it, I think.
2. What songs would be on the soundtrack?
Nothing that currently exists. See, in my infinite nerdism, I would want to do it ala the Spawn soundtrack. While that particular soundtrack was largely crap, it was the “pair up two artists” thing that intrigued me. So I would want to pair up artists that I listen to a lot and see what comes out. Tiger Yamato and Trent Reznor. DJ Shadow and dj TAKA. TaQ and Guster. DJ Krush and Aphex Twin. good-cool and Gorillaz. Asletics and Coldplay. The Streets and Akira Yamaoka. And so on – hey, I’m dreaming here.
3. Would it be a live-action film or animated? Why?
Animated. More explicitly, animated by Steve Tze. Come on – why do you think the only picture of myself I have readily available is the one that Steve drew me? He is my god.
4. Casting: who would play you, members of your family, friends, etc?
Well, if it was animated, we could all voice ourselves, I guess.
5. Describe the movie preview/trailer.
I think it’d be appropriate to just pipe all my ethernet traffic into a window, and run it Matrix-style. Splice that in with “action shots”, and run R5 in the background, and you’re set.

I’m quite happy to report that Mike Jasper’s ConstantCommentary has returned after a far-too-long absence.
If you’ve never heard me wax poetic about Mike before, he is one of the funniest and most under-appreciated writers/comedians/songwriters I’ve ever had the chance to appreciate. Do yourself a favor – dig around the archives. Alternately, be lazy and just read the top picks. Alternately, just be REALLY lazy and just read some excerpts.
Good to have you back, Mike.

Many moons ago – nearly six months, actually – I wrote what would become a semi-legendary album review of Dancemania EX2. One of the many Toshiba EMI Dancemania releases (which is where most licensed DDR tracks come from, hence the interest), this album was notable for a number of reasons…
…largely because it was absolute crap.
Shortly after my return from NYC, I heard the three characters I was praying I would never hope to hear: “EX3“. My logic and reason screamed no, but the sadomasochist in me shouted yes, and so here I sit, ready to listen to said album.
Standard rating system notes: As with the official ID3 MP3 rating system, songs are rated from 1 (absolute trash) to 100 (solid gold). Songs rated at 40 or higher should be considered at least somewhat redeemable. Songs rated at 50 or higher should be considered above average. Ratings of 60 or higher are good enough to be included in my “Top Rated” playlist (currently containing 1870 songs out of a total of 5785), while songs above 80 go into the “Only The Best” playlist (currently 131 songs).
Here we go.