Curesed I Tell You! Cursed!!!
So the other day I once again woke up with a nosebleed. This is the third time this year that it's happened to me. So naturally I came to the only logical conclusion I could: My pillow case is cursed. Of course I have evidence to back this up. I have two sets of sheets, each with it's own main pillow case (i.e. the pillow for my head, since I do sleep with as many pillows as I can in my bed). Now if each day were equally likely to result in a nosebleed, say 40:1, then you'd guess that the standard sheets would have the majority of these incidents. Not so! In fact all three times have been when I've had my backup sheets on the bed. Needless to say this doesn't look so pretty on my bed since my backup sheets are basically white, and blood doesn't come out easily from that. But let's look at the statistical rational behind my conclusion. I only have the backup sheets on for like a week per month the odds of them being on are about 3:1. Comparing these numbers it's clear to see that 40 is much bigger than 1, and even 3 doesn't compare to the might of 40. So one can only conclude that the odds of my pillow case being cursed are even, with the other major option being that my pillow is the one that is cursed insted, and a distant chance of coincidence of medical situations. So until an exocism can be done on my sheets I've decided not to leave fingerprints on anything, so the cops can't trace any crimes back to me, find that my sheets are bloody, and convict me on the spot. Of course the exorcism wouldn't really get out the blood stains, so I guess I better just burn the sheets and not touch anything ever again. You can never be too careful.