Slowly Learning...

If only she were 10 years younger or I was 10 years older... *sigh*

Posted by Thom at 10:59 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

"So you have a monkey on the edge of a lazy susan, and he throws a football to a person standing in the center who has a clock in Tanzania. How old is the monkey? So naturally you calculate angular momentum, adjust for gravity, figure in wind resistance, and you come up with the monkey being 5 years old."
- Quote from my Methods of Applied Math Professor, explaining a standard problem in Physics

Posted by Thom at 10:47 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

I'm a big fan of gambling/casino movies, so naturally I expected to like this movie. How wrong I was... The whole idea of the movie is that Bernie (William H. Macy) is an unlucky guy, who is used by Shelly (Alec Baldwin) to cool off hot tables at his casino, thus insuring that the casino gets the players' money. I guess I should have seen the problems at this point, but I over looked them in hopes that a good movie would still arise. It didn't. The idea that all of Vegas is based on luck, and that this man had the magical ability to make people lose was too much. Adding to this was the idea that once Bernie falls in love with Natalie (Maria Bello) his luck instantly changes. And as his rollercoaster (a very boring rollercoaster) of a relationship changes him from happy to sad, so comes and goes his luck. The realist and gambler in me couldn't get past this whole part. I'm sick of the idea that with a little luck you can win thousands of dollars in the casinos. You can't. Sure maybe you'll hit it big a couple of times, but you'll end up paying it all back to them in the end. It's this hope that keeps the casinos in business, which is fine with me cause it gives me something entertaining to do. But I'm sick of seeing it in films.

Now if this archaic theme wasn't enough, they also had to throw in the oldest, and most out dated, idea in Vegas that the casinos are run by the mob, and if you cheat them or they just don't like you then they'll take you out back to rough you up, or drop your dead body in the desert. Please people, this is long gone. Sure you can still get big trouble for getting caught cheating (through the legal system) or casinos can throw you out and bar you for life just cause they suspect that you may be counting cards or something (i.e. you're a consistant big winner, and they don't like it). But you're not gonna get beat up by the casino personal, least of all by the head of the casino. Maybe I could believe this whole idea if the movie was set 30 years ago, but not in modern day Vegas.

Finally the end did come though, where our unlucky hero bets it all on a throw of the dice! Does he win? Does he lose? Do I even care anylonger? Yes, no (we lose for having sat there watching this movie for 2 hours) and absolutely not. After the "suspenseful" period where the director/writer keeps us in the dark of wether he won or lost, we finally come to what I thought could be at least a small saving point. A corrupt cop (now that's a novel idea in a movie about a mob run casino!) stops Bernie and Natalie and is about to shoot them in the back of their heads and leave their bodies out in the desert. But of course we need our happy ending, so magically a drunk driver hits the cop and our heros are saved! Oh, and of course the corporate hot shot who is trying to turn the old fashioned casino into a modern Vegas Strip style place takes over after Shelly is killed by his old friend who is trying to usher in the new (yup, that's exactly how the corporations took over Vegas, by killing the mobsters).

Add in a couple pointlessly under-developed characters (Bernie's son and daughter-in-law) and you have one of the few movies that I actually felt like walking out of cause I just couldn't take it and no longer cared what happened to anyone. I'm guessing if you've read this far then you can probably guess my rating for the movie, but here it is anyway.

RATING: Not Worth a Free Screening, Waste of Space on Rental Shelves

Posted by Thom at 10:52 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

So originally when Extended Play became Xplay, and Morgan Webb joined up, I thought that the show was doomed. Early on she was ackward and out of place on the show, while Adam Sessler single-handily attempted to carry the show on his whit, charm, and experience. Boy am I glad I stuck through the rough patch though. X-Play is now more entertaining than Extended Play ever was. The 2 hosts blend fantastically. There's no where else that I'd rather go for my semi-weekly video game reviews (true, this is partially due to the lack of video game related shows on TV, but still). And while their ratings still consist of a numerical scale, unlike my simplified movie review ratings, they are generally rather on the money. I guess it also doesn't hurt any that Morgan is an attractive woman who enjoys video games, a very rare and special breed. Someday I too will find an attractive videogaming woman and live happily ever after (assuming she's attracted to me as well, a rejection by such a woman wouldn't lead to happily-ever-after status).

Posted by Thom at 2:32 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

So as much as I tried, I didn't actually kill my latest car. However, I did do some serious damage to it and probably won't get it back for another week or so. And in my slow learning process I have also decided to try posting two pictures of the car's condition up for all of you to enjoy.

Posted by Thom at 9:55 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

So I really don't like Prof. who teach staright out of books. If I wanted to learn that way then I'd just read the damn book and not bother with the class. I have enough problems paying attention without the added boredom of not having to pay attention. Too bad that 2 of my math classes basically seem to be taking this path. However this does help when trying to understand the foreign Profs. And even if they didn't teach right from the book I doubt I'd be able to pay attention anyway, I am after all a slacker at heart. So mainly my problem with teaching out of the book is that I have to carry the book around all day. And if I'm anything then I'm lazy, plus those books are big and heavy.
So the moral of this tale is that an object at rest tends to remain at rest, but only if you hold it tight. If you let go, things fly away from you for no apparent reason.

Posted by Thom at 12:55 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

So I've made it through almost all my new classes now (just one left to go) and I can say it's just like when I left. 3 of my Profs have accents (2 heavy accents, 1 British one), it's cold and snowy, it's semi-hilly, and some other things too. I haven't quite adjusted to the major breaks I have in my days (I had a 5.5 hour break today cuase of shorter classes) but maybe that will actually motivate me to do work for once (somehow I do doubt that though). I also am stuck in a couple of freshman classes where I probably stick out a bit (Intro to Soc and Compostion 100, woo!). I do however have my 3 math courses. Of course the first is taught by the old chinese dude who finsihes every sentence with " 'm'i wight?" and the other lady who's accent I can't quite place. I'm just waiting to see what course #3 brings to the table of comprehensiblity imparements...

Posted by Thom at 3:45 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I thought about making an entry tonight, but then I also thought about the fact that it's 4 am.

Posted by Thom at 4:00 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Is there anything more disturbingly entertaining than Talk Sex on Oxygen? Where else can you watch a 70 year old lady reviewing vibrators and talking about sex with callers?

Posted by Thom at 11:56 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

So I'd like to use this space to give a shout out to my most dependable reader and contributor, Emily. Thank you for letting me know that there is someone out there who's interested in what I've got to say (although I'm still trying to figure out why...). Keep up the good work of making me feel loved with random comments!

-Thom

Posted by Thom at 2:36 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

So I'm now on my 4th car in the last month, but let me explain. I only broke 2 of them, so it's really not that bad. So let me recount the events leading up to and preceeding the latest incident...

I had nothing much to do Thursday night, so I decided to head up to Turning Stone and play some poker. After waiting around for almost an hour for a spot to open up I got a seat at a $1-5 7-card stud table. I played for 4 hours and managed to turn my $100 into $250, not a bad night I must say. Having the common sense to not stick around and watch it all disappear I decided to then head back to Ithaca. Well at this point the weather had started to get a little worse but it was still drivable, until I got to a section of 481 South. As I was driving along a gust of wind blew a large drift of snow onto my car, blinding me. Instinctively I let up and the gas and stepped on the brake to slow down a little so I wouldn't hit anything. Well it seems that at that same time I managed to hit a patch of ice too and the car managed to fishtail and run head first into the gaurd rail. Seeing as how I knocked out both headlights and part of the engine I figured that I shouldn't drive the car. However, in a marvel of modern safety, the air bag decided not to deploy despite the head on colision. I guess that's just as well cause it would've just been more trouble than good. The local cops came, got the car towed to east syracuse, and gave me a ride to the Dewitt Wegmans. So there I was, standing in the lobby of Wegmans with my golf clubs (I took them out of the trunk before the car got towed) at 2 in the morning waiting for my dad to arrive from Rochester to pick me up. So in a tribute to my first and current jobs (Ridgemont Country Club and Wegmans) I decided to give my clubs a good washing as I waited. And I'm quite sure that this seemed weird to all the people who passed by (including the two cute girls that smiled at me and said goodnight to me as they left) to see a man standing in lobby of Wegmans, with blowing snow outside with sub zero temperatures, washing his golf clubs. Eventually my dad did arrive though and we headed back to Rochester. We got in at about 7 am and I went straight to bed. I slept pretty soundly too, appart from the very odd dream of working on a movie premiere at the planitariium in Rochester with Britney Spears who (straight off her divorce) got back together with Justin (who apparently was dating Christina Agulera at the time). I got up the next morning (2pm) and drove my mom's car back to Ithaca, where I arrived with just enough time to clean up and shower before our poker game at our appartment (which I also managed to win, I am on a roll). As I checked my email after getting back I also was informed that I'm paying too much for car insurance. Apparently these people haven't seen my recent track record with automobiles. All in all it was a rather busy day and a half. Unfottunately I still had no time (or conditions) to make my snowman. Maybe I'll be able to build him this Monday or Tuesday before classes start on Wed. And while all this was fun and interesting I do look forward to the stability of two days of work.

P.S. - Yes, I am fine and no one else was hurt in the accident. The car however...let's just say that it's seen better days (and might not see anymore).

Posted by Thom at 2:31 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

So I'm gonna say this once, and it'll probably be the last time you hear me say this, cause those of you that know me know that I pride my self on never complaining about this, but it was too cold out today. Now let me clarify that. It wasn't too cold out for me, rather it was too cold out for the snow. See, I thought that I'd spend one of my days off being a kid again and making a snowman in the backyard that we actually have this year, but no, the damn snow said it was too cold for me to do that. It was so close to perfect, but it needed to be just a few degrees warmer to get that semi-melty wetness to the snow so it would stick better. Insted I was let with respectable packing snow, that just wouldn't stick together well enough to roll out a snowman. My only consolation was making a tiny 1' tall snowman out of snowballs, but that was just a weak attempt to satisfy my craving. Unfortunately for me, the weather only seems to be getting colder for the next couple days, until Saturday when it starts to warm up again. But, by then I'm back to work. My only hope is that it will warm up on Friday so I can still make my snowman before my four day mid-week weekend is up. This delay also means that I have to remember not to eat all the carrots before Friday, or else I'll have a sorry looking nose-less snowman, and I don't want that.

Posted by Thom at 3:35 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

So I've been watching the new Real World, yes you heard me right, and boy are these people stupid. I don't know what it is. Are the Real Worlders getting dumber as the seasons go on, or am I just getting smarter and have higher standards for people? I think it's a combination of both. I do have higher standards, and hotter people are gnerally dumber. Plus the addition of alcohol, which is a must to make the Real World interesting (for both the actors and the veiwers) makes people much stupider. It also makes things more interesting, hence it's addition to all episodes. I have no other point, or end to this rant, so that's all. Good night.

Posted by Thom at 12:37 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

So I don't have the energy or inspiration to go into great depth, so I'm just gonna keep it simple tonight. Big Fish's main story line is a little cheesy and boring, but I guess you sort of need it, like Forest sitting on the bench telling his stories to those who'll listen. Much in the same way as Forest Gump, the main heart of the movie is in all the "flashback" stories chronicaling the life of Ed Bloom. Like in Gump, the stories are outrageously unbelievable. However, in Gump that is because it's hard to imagine all this happening to a single man, in Big Fish it's hard to imagine it happening to anyone. The over the top farie tale nature to the stories give the movie it's charm, you just have to get past the story of the son who is trying to find the truth in the fiction about his father's life. I guess you do need this real world element to keep it balanced, but Will Bloom just wasn't as interesting as his father (even his story at the end just doesn't compare to his dad's). This doesn't completely derail the movie though, and it keeps going rather strong with a nicely done performance from Ewan McGregor.

RATING: Worth a Cheap/Medium Priced Ticket, Worth a Rental

Posted by Thom at 2:54 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

So I went into this movie not really expecting to like it. I had heard plenty of good things and all, but I'm not very big on Civil War movies, or Nicole Kidman, but I really enjoyed the movie. True Kidman did still seem a little bit off, not really seeming to me to fit into the soutern bell role perfectly, but that's ok. As for the Civil War part, that's just back story really. The beginning fools you into thinking that it may just be a civil war love story, but it quickly turns. Jude Law is wounded and tries to find his way home to his love (a woman he hardly knows and who he believes may not even remember him). Along the way he runs into many characters who are unique and a little strange, but interesting all the same. This is when you really begin to see the movie shift. The travels and story follow along some of the same lines as the most famous journey ever (Homer's Odyssey). How closely it follows I'm not really sure (I'm not fully versed in the story), but some of the more well known parts do stick out (Sirens for one). All in all the story is a wonderful tale that works very well in the setting, with enough new characters introduced at every turn to keep you engaged through the entire film (which does run a little longer than usual movies at 2.5 hours). There are numerous cameo/minor supporting roles from lots of well known actors and actresses including: Donald Sutherland, Phillip Seymour Hoffman, Jena Malone, Ethan Suplee, Natalie Portman, and Giovanni Ribisi (to name just a few of the recognizable faces). But the performance that stood out the most to me would have to be Renee Zellweger's job as Ruby Thewes. She (and the makeup/wardrobe people) did such an excellent job as the tough tomboy who comes to help out Kidman's character that I almost didn't believe that it was her. I'm really starting to think about her as a real solid actress now after seeing what she really can do. All in all I liked the movie. It was a little long, but kept going well enough to counter that, and some of the characters seemed a little out of place, but that just helped give me umph to the fantastical epic tale nature of the story. Although I'm still not a big fan of Nicole Kidman, I can at least appreciate her performance in this movie.

RATING: Worth a Full Price Ticket, Worth a Rental

Posted by Thom at 3:30 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Here is the official rundown of the list (in order). You can check the individual posts for the details. Enjoy

1 - Clue
2 - The Usual Suspects
3 - Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon
4 - Croupier
5 - Army of Darkness
6 - The Big Kahuna
7 - South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut
8 - Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas
9 - Monty Python and the Holy Grail
10 - Office Space
11 - Rushmore
12 - Life is Beautiful
13 - Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels

Posted by Thom at 11:35 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Oh how I miss those simpler days when I would lay in my bed, in the middle of the floor, looking at the dishes placed so neatly on the bookshelves, thinking to myself, "maybe I should move that couch so I can once again use that door." But alas, time moves forward, and now I'm here laying in my bed, in the corner of the room, looking at the 3 foot pile of clothes in the closet, thinking to myself, "would it be more or less confusing if I put back up the 'USE OTHER DOOR -->' signs now?"

Posted by Thom at 3:15 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

And the winner is...

5 - Army of Darkness
Cult classic does not even begin to classify this movie. Bruce Campbell brings is slickness to the greatest anit-hero role ever. The special effects may be outdated and cheap (very cheap and outdated) but that just adds to the film's charm. The entire movie is just layered with one-liner after one-liner that everyone knows (or should know!). As a side note, the "happy ending" that is in the normal version is better than the director's cut ending.

2 - The Usual Suspects
This would easily be my second most watched movie, after Clue of course, and it's still great to watch. You'd think a mystery movie like this would lose it's intensity once you've seen it a couple of times, but Kevin Spacey (and the writers as well, I guess) keep you wanting to see it again and again. It also helps that the movie has a great cast as well. And, believe me or not, I had figured out the real "who-dunnit" before it was revealed! (I feel so smart)

9 - Monty Python and the Holy Grail
Once again Terry Gilliam makes it onto the list! (This time he acts as well) The best sketch comics ever (yes, even greater than the Kids in the Hall) come together in their greatest feature film. It'll make you laugh, it'll make you cry (from laughing), it'll make you learn, wether you want to or not!! Apart from it's comic greatness, the movie is also factually correct, maybe?

That wraps it up. I hope you all have enjoyed my list of my Top 13 DVDs. Tune in tomorrow for something completely different!

Posted by Thom at 11:32 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Once more...

7 - South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut
It's crude, it's vulgar, it's a cartoon, and it's the best musical ever! I wasn't sure about it going in, cause I wasn't a big fan of the show at the time, but I came out loving it. The story is a humorous, self referencial tale of the US going to war with Canada over a movie with dirty langauge. It taunts the fact that language must be censored in our nation, but sex and violence are no real problem at all. So not only is it funny, and a great tribute to musicals, it also has a satiricly story that tries to teach us an important lesson, Don't underestimate the Canadian Army's cunning!

12 - Life is Beautiful
You wouldn't think a movie could have a lighthearted story about the Holocaust without slighting the horrors that people had to endure, but Roberto Benigni did just that. Life is Beautiful is such a wonderfully touching tale of a father trying to protect his son from what is happening all around them. With his comic genious and a great story Benigni makes you laugh while tugging at your heart strings. (And yes people, this is another "reader")

8 - Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas
Johnny Depp in, in my opinion, his greatest role ever, add to that Terry Gilliam's direction in yet another messed up tale and you get one freaked out Las Vegas journey through the eyes of a drugged up journalist. Awsome performances from Depp and Del Toro (along with cameoes from Tobey Maguire, Gary Busey, Christina Ricci, Cameron Diaz, Lyle Lovett, Flea, and Thompson himself), bazaar, and the greatest recorded drug trip in history. This movie is a winner all around.

Tomorrow: The Final Installment!

Posted by Thom at 11:23 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

3rd installment...

10 - Office Space
Office Space is a weird movie. It's the kind of movie that seems to get better each time you watch it. First time, it's ok. Second time, it's better. Third time, it's funny as hell. Fourth time, it's a classic. I'm not sure why, but that's fine with me. It just means that it has massively great replay value. Maybe part of the appeal lies in the whole concept of the movie too: slack off and you'll be rewarded. And who wouldn't love to talk back to their boss while getting paid to eat cheetos and play tetris?

4 - Croupier
I'm going to guess most of you never saw this movie since it was an indie release from England (plus I even had to go to Canada just ot get the DVD), but let me tell you, you're missing out. Clive Owen gives a beautifully detached performance as a calculating dealer who never gambles in life. Insted he observes all that happens around him, incorporating it into his novel. Though the casino/gambling aspects of the movie really attracted me in the beginning, the actual plot (which only seems to use the casino as a backdrop to the story) is what reeled me in. If you can find a copy near you, get your hands on it. If not, come see me, I'll let you in on my favorite British movie of all-time.

Posted by Thom at 11:49 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

The List: Part 2...

6 - The Big Kahuna
Kevin Spacey, Danny DeVito, and Peter Facinelli in a sinlge room before/during/after a business convention. Simple setting, simple idea, deep story. When you start with 2 fantastic actors oout of a pobbile 3 (espeically Spacey, one of my favorites) how can you go wrong? It's easy to see how it could be based on play (Hospitality Suite) since it takes place in a single room with only 3 actors and clear cut act breaks, but the movie is about substance, not style. With the three characters we're shown the religious man, the non-religous man, and the middle of the road questioning man. These three play together in a very interesting way. And of course Spacey's delivery and timing will leave you cracking up.

13 - Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels
Now both Snatch and this movie are good flicks, but what makes this one stand out as one of my favorite is how it isn't a bunch of stories that blend together (like Snatch) but rather gives more of the feel of many parts to a single story. With a lot going on (and the british accents/slang) you have to stay involved with the story to follow along, but that's not a problem. The way the story branches and reuinties, along with the great comic elements (and let's not forget Sting) keep you hooked all the way through. Another plus over Snatch is the non-Hollywood cast. Sure Brad Pitt did a great job in Snatch, but Dennis Farina was just too American and too out of place. Lock Stock has the great story line(s) and great casting/acting that put it up here on my list.

That's all for now, tune in tomorrow for another chunk.

Posted by Thom at 11:16 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

The new year is upon us, and so is the first installment of my TOP 13 DVD LIST. I've decided to break it up into groups of 2 or 3 random movies at a time for my sake, as well as yours. I have also ranked these top 13 (nothing too set in stone, but just a general guide for my normal feelings about them). So, enjoy:

#3 - Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon
This is an obvious choice for me. I have a fascination with sword play, an interest in asian cultures (mainly Japanese, but Chinese as well), I'm a fan of foreign films, and I like hot asian girls. Not only does this movie have all that going for it, but it's also one of the most beautiful films I've seen in a long time. The locations, especially the tree-top fight, are gorgeous, and the fights are so fluid and well coreographed that it's almost like watching a ballet, except it isn't boring and sucky!

#11 - Rushmore
This tale of an over-achieving under-achiever is a nice break from the normal competitive hollywood romance story. The characters are all over the place from a widowed teacher, to a young student, to a unhappily married businessman. The way that all three are somehow worked out to be on the same level playing field is wonderous and hilarious. What other movie has a teenaged boy directing a play about Vietnam (complete with explosives and a live campfire on stage) and Serpico? Oh, did I also mention that Alexis Bledel appears (uncredited) in a couple of scenes? That's got winner written all over it.

#1 - Clue
Board game turned feature film turned Comedy Classic. This movie had an all-star cast before they were all stars! Alternate endings? You bet! We've got 3 endings that all work (sort of) in this murder mystery! Sure it has a bunch of plot holes (it's a comedy before it's a murder mystery) but who cares when you're laughing your ass off? There are so many great one liners, two liners, responses, and conversations that are delivered with comic genious by some of the greats (ok, semi-greats). I can honestly say I've watched this movie more than any of my others (maybe more than all my other combined, but that might be stretching it a little). Just as Ani Difranco's "Little Plastic Castle" was a no brainer for my #1 CD, this is a no brainer for my favorite DVD.

more to come tomorrow...

Posted by Thom at 9:11 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

The new Peter Pan may be rated PG, but it's pushing it a little. This isn't exactly the happy kiddie Disney cartoon. It's more of grown up fairy tale for the generation that grew up on the old disney classic. It still has its youthful elements and all, but it also has a stronger love connection between Peter and Wendy, as well as a lot more death and violence as Pirates are shot, stabbed, etc. However it's not overly gruesome (no real blood except for one small part). The movie has a very storybook feel to it as well. The scenery and backdrops seem to have poped out of illustrations from the book and work beautifully to envelope you in the whole environment. I also enjoyed the touch of having Hook be played as a truely evil man, not just some stooge that Pan toys around with. The major fault that a story like this runs into is the reliance on young actors and actresses, who can tend to stumble through parts or seem forced and unbelievable in their roles, but the casting was excellent. The child actors were fantastic and prefectly cast. Insted of getting wrapped up in the whole "movie actor" aspect and overdoing it, they played the parts as the children they truely are. The story will surprise no one who is at all familiar with Peter Pan, but the visuals and presentation of the classic fairy tale was perfect.

RATING: Worth Full Price

Posted by Thom at 8:48 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

So here is my Expanding Theory. As scientists have proven, despite the forces of gravitational attraction, the universe is in fact expanding. Why is this happeneing? I'll tell you. Way back when, before the time of science and reason, the universe was sitting all nice and pretty, content with itself. But then humans came along, and they started to wonder about things. This curiousity led to the developement of science and the exploration of more information. Now our universe is not infinite as some may think. In fact it is more like a closed surface (such as a balloon). And as we gather more and more information and facts about the universe we come up with more and more laws of nature. We have also discovered that there are more than the 4 dimensions we are normally familiar with. My theory is that these extra dimensions, which we cannot see because they are so thin, are actually dimensions of knowledge. So as we gather more and more knowledge these dimensions grow larger and larger. And it is the growth of these dimensions that is expanding our universe. Think of the universe as a balloon. We then reside on the outer shell, this is our visible dimensions. Now inside the balloon are the other dimensions that we originally were unable to even detect. So now, as the inner dimensions grow and expand, the outer dimensions are stretched as welll, creating the expansion of the universe. I'm sure by now you've also guessed what this could mean to the vary fabric of space-time. As the balloon grows larger and larger, the outer layer begins to strain and is unable to contain the inner expanding dimensions. Then, at a given point, the balloon will buckle under the pressure and pop, creating the Second Big Bang, which will in turn destroy our universe as we know it. It's hard to say when this Second Bang will occur, but one thing is safe to say, it's our own damn fault. If we hadn't been so curious and so eager to learn this would never have even begun. Shame on you all.

Posted by Thom at 5:05 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

So the new year got me thinking back to 2000. Back then we were all affraid of the Y2K problem, which ended up getting all fixed up and nothing happened. However...in their short sightedness the scienticians, being the lazy fools they are, neglected a bigger problem. What happens in the year 10000!!! For anyone who's thought about it at all the answer is quite obvious. In about 8000 years the calendar will loop back to the year 0. We won't just be losing 100 years like the Y2K switch, we'll lose all 10,000 of the previous years. You may just think that we can get around this by adding yet another digit to the computer times, but where does that end? No where, that's where. We will always continue to have more years, which will lead to more digits, and the loop continues. Plus when you bring in the uncertainty principle we can clearly prove that even this mild adjustment is impossible. The basics of the calculations come down to a simple equation:

Uncertainty + Computers = 4 Digits for Dates

So naturally when we get to 10000 A.D. computers (which will have advanced light years) will force us all back to the year 0. There is no escaping the ramifications of our time journey. So we must all prepare for the re-birth of Jesus. Time is short, we have less than 8000 years, so get working!

Posted by Thom at 1:35 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)