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Year 2003

The Fun Of Christmas, Part 2

Here’s the present list to the best of my memory, since I’m typing this two floors beneath the horde of presents. PS2 Games – Beyond Good & Evil, Space Channel 5 Special Edition, Prince Of Persia Sands Of Time. Katie got FFX-2, so I should probably mention that here, no? GC Games – Pokemon Channel GBA Games – Mario & Luigi, Fire Emblem, Sword Of Mana Mac/iPod Stuff – Oxygen 8 Midi controller, Traktor DJ Studio 2.5, new HP printer/scanner/copier, extra Firewire iPod cable, iTrip Books – the Python autobiography, the Complete Far Side Collection, David Foster Wallace’s new book, a crossword puzzle book DVDs – Ben Stiller Show, Eraserhead Ridiculously Expensive Edition, Directors Collection: Michael Gondry & Spike Jonze, Blue Velvet Special Edition Clothes – a surprising amount; 4 pairs of pants, a sweater, a shirt, pajama pants, and some underwear Other – got a lot of skin care products, which is probably good because I treat my skin like crap. Large variety of candy, scaling up to a pound of really good cocoa mix I picked out at Dylan’s. Special Distinction For The Most Random Yet Cool Gift – one of my uncles sent me the music sampler CD for DDR MAXUSA that was nearly impossible to come by. Now, I have all the songs on it already across all my other collections, but it’s still ridiculously cool. I’m sure I’m leaving something off, so don’t be surprised if this gets updated repeatedly.

The Fun Of Christmas, Part 1

I’m breaking my Christmas entry into two parts; one to cover the events of the day, and the other for the loot list. Warning: This blog entry is disgusting. It involves an event that, thankfully, has gotten me past much of my sickness, but is utterly disgusting and not the sort of thing I want to subject people to unless they really want to know. Hence, you have to click to get the full entry.

Make It Stop

So, as you might’ve noticed, it’s Christmas. You’ll also notice it’s nearly 2 AM. You’ll also notice I’m not signed on to all my usual spots while I post this. Here’s the deal: We are in Maryland for Christmas. The pile of gifts upstairs is extremely absurd. I am the only person still awake. Why am I still awake? Because, like clockwork, I have come down with the goddamn flu. And let me tell you, out of all the fun sicknesses I’ve ever come down with, this one is in the top three all time wackiest. I feel like I’m floating a foot above my body. My head is congested to shit. My entire body aches, my sinuses are congested, and I’ve had some fun hacking cough episodes. The only way I feel better right now is if I stay up – which I discovered wasn’t much of a problem after trying to sleep for 3 hours and realizing I wasn’t able to conk out. If I stay in bed, my body decides to make me feel like shit. I figured I’d try and wear myself down a little more with a blog post. (I realize the inability to sleep may be the standard Christmas-related reason, but at 23, I thought I was mostly over this.) I feel like I am completely drugged even though I haven’t taken anything lately. Actually I don’t know the last time I took anything. There are significantly less clocks in the house than I remember. But hey, 7th Style CS confirmed! Good news for all us IIDX freaks. Can’t wait until May. So Merry Christmas to all, and let’s all post loot lists later today so we can compare and contrast.

Web Plugs Are Rare These Days

It’s been quite a long time since I did a blog post specifically to link to something cool, but Japander.com has taken that cake. It’s a site full of US stars in Japanese ads – think Lost In Translation, only real. Be sure to check the Simpsons ones.

Thank You, Laquita

From: Laquita <Jinay@gomail.com.ua>
Subject: Feel better remy
Date: May 12, 2002 8:42:38 PM EDT
To: Dan Dickinson

(spam follows)

Dear Laquita: Thank you for hoping I feel better. I was not aware that I felt badly, but I will readily admit that I could feel better. You have certainly made my day brighter.

A Night Of Tinkle

Here’s my summary of tonight’s Tinkle, written as quickly and as thoroughly as possible. Katie was worn out from a hellish work week and her parents visiting, so I went alone. Got to Pianos around 6:45, had a gin & tonic followed by a coke (no dinner means I was actually feeling it for once. Whoo.) Line formed, I was about 10 back. Line snaked down the hallway, back onto itself, and then almost a third time before they started letting us in. I grabbed a seat, ended up going upstairs and selling off my extra ticket, and then coming back downstairs.

Show started at 8:05; video this time was Todd/Jon/David after the Tinkle Booze Cruise saying they would see each other in 4 months, and then staring at each other…and then some gay porn with their heads superimposed. Not as good as the kid who read the poem, but still amusing.

The theme for most of the segments tonight was giving away shitty presents. They were drawing names off the pre-sale list. First present was a twin pack of women’s deodorant. Then an orange golf ball (Jon: “Now go and play some orange golf.”) A guy got one of those menstruation books with a tampon case with a name that alludes me.

First comedian: Some guy pretending to be Native American. Jokes were obscure but funny because of the mannerisms. Crowd was definitely split, though.

Guys were back on for a bit about some Viagra spam David got, not about how women like bigger penises, but how men were surveyed and found not to respect men with smaller penises. Smaller being “5 or 6 inches”. Some improv scenes followed.

Second comedian: Janeane Garofalo. Poor girl was not doing well in terms of material; she had a sheet that she kept referring to, was doing a bit too much current event stuff…some was funny, but most was meh.

Guys back up for more presents. Some people from upstairs get called, and there’s booing because we all paid to get in. Todd gives away a copy of his CD he got back from Amazon because it was damaged, and later snipes at Jon: “Maybe you should do something other than cartoon voices.” They’re giving away presents to people with funny last names, which gives me hope. They try to get someone Jewish, and pick a guy with the last name of Jewfer. He is not Jewish.

Third comedian: The Guy With Tiny Hands. Entire bit revolved around him having tiny hands, which were doll hands he was holding onto and doing “what if so and so had tiny hands? I think it would go like this” and doing a poor impersonation. Not funny on blogpaper, but it was killing the crowd.

Jon and Todd up – they introduce an “author” played by David who has written a self-help book called “Hey Douche”, involving such gems of wisdom like “HEY DOUCHE – AN APPLE A DAY KEEPS THE DOCTOR AWAY”. The last one in his book is “HEY DOUCHE – EAT BEETS, IT TURNS YOUR PEE RED.” One to grow on. A few more presents and we’re off again.

Fourth comedian: Eugene Mirman. He kills everyone with a little current events, a personal recounting of Fleet bank fucking him over, and finishes with a video of a robot. Great stuff.

Guys are on for one last present giveaway before the secret mystery band comes on. I finally get picked. I open it up – it’s Jon Benjamin’s expired Screen Actor’s Guild card. I realize that given the rest of the presents, this is somewhat high up on the cool meter, but doesn’t even touch the bottle of vodka a girl near me won. GO MCGURK.

Mystery band is revealed to be – Yo La Tengo. Score. They did a good set, and I was glad to finally hear them. Guys come back on one last time, thank us, say they don’t know when the next show will be. I go out into the bar, have Jon sign the SAG card (he had never signed it), and go home happy.

No Five Songs This Week

But why, you ask? Because I’m working on my magnificent TOP X OF 2003 lists for movies, music, and games (where X is completely arbitrary). I’m sure you’re thrilled.

Schedule Of The Next 30 Days

People who want to keep tabs on me are highly suggested to watch my iCal Calendar, as I will be really hard to get ahold of for the next month at times.

Katie Turns 24

Today’s the day – my poor wife turns 24 and continues to feel the dread of turning older. Happy birthday, sweetie.

Birthday wishes can be send to her email, which can be found on her blog, which you should know where the link is by now.

Any parties interested who can’t make the birthday party tonight might be interested in coming to the Tinkle Holiday Madness show on Sunday night. We’ll be there.

Five Songs Of The Week

This week is a week like many others. Here are the five songs I’ve been playing the hell out of: Just Be, by m-flo, off Planet Shining It’s funny how often I’m finding new m-flo songs to write about, given that they haven’t really released much lately. Another song off their first album (like orbit-3), this one is just as laid back, has a good Lisa vocal line, and some decent rapping from Verbal; the refrain is what slays me every time, though. Hey Ya! by Outkast, off The Love Below After I had first seen the video for Hey Ya!, I said to myself “I know that at some point I am going to be driven to find this song and listen to it ad naseum.” Then the other half of my brain goes “RESIST THE TEMPTATION. NEVER FORGET WHAT THEY DID TO THE ROOTS.”* But this is far too catchy and far too fun to hold a grudge. (* Long story short, when they were playing a show with The Roots at Cornell during my freshman year, they started a fight between the bands over who would go on last; Outkast claimed they should because they had sold more records, as opposed to The Roots who were listed as the headliners on the materials. Outkast won.) Midsummer Flowers – Midsummer Dreams by Sana, off Sana-Mode II I liked the song on the 9th Style OST, I like it even more full-length. Sana hits all her vocal marks here; the half-screeching yell, full singing, half speak-singing, she can do it all. And while I can’t figure out what genre this is, it’s all good. Happy Holidays (Beef Wellington Mix), by Bing Crosby, off Christmas Remixed Look, we’re all sick to shit of Christmas songs. That’s why you need to go and buy Christmas Remixed immediately; it will return Christmas music to your good graces. Many of the tracks on the album stand out, but I can only choose one, so I submit for your approval this funky jazzed up version of Bing’s Happy Holidays, with lots of brass and verve. Do pick this one up. Small Waves, by dj TAKA, off Beatmania IIDX 4th Style OST I’ve been trying to pick IIDX back again after the moving-induced hiatus. After randomly tossing in 4th Style again and finding the handful of songs I liked once more, I kept coming back to this one. There are some great little riffs in here, and it’s such a fun bouncing track, how can I not listen to this? How can anyone? Alright, enough gushing for now.